After Crying
History of the group 1986–1994
What follows here is a memoir. While I have tried to be historically faithful, the accuracy of historians cannot be expected; there may be an imprecise date or two here and there. I apologise to all those whose names I have forgotten, or perhaps omitted, from this writing: it was not intentional. There will be no personal attacks, insults or anger in these lines: I will only make reference to the nature of human relationships when it is essential to understanding the history of the band.
t
In the autumn of 1986, I was a composition student at the Conservatory, leader of the band Második Vonal and musician of the Tanulmány Theatre [1] led by Somogyi István. Második Vonal, whose founding members included Torma Ferenc, Baross Gábor (later drummer of Townscream), Rókusfalvy Pál (later winemaker and well-known TV presenter) and the later joined Görgényi Tamás, was in its final days. I was the main reason for this, because I forced the band to change their style in a way they didn't want to. Our last concert was in October 1986 at the club of the Semmelweis University (SOTE). After one of the last concerts, Reinhardt Pisti, an excellent actor from the Tanulmány Theatre, came up to me and asked me why I didn't give solo concerts. This hit the nail on my head and I started to build up a plan for such a show. I decided that a sole piano would be boring, and it occurred to me that it would be a good idea to supplement this planned programme with Egervári Gábor, a good friend of mine since primary school, who was then a musician at the Tanulmány Theater. I rang him up, he liked the idea and agreed. But I was still not totally satisfied. I remembered that in the conservatoire I met a very talented cellist, Pejtsik Péter, a philosophic minded guy open for everything new, and with whom I spent several hours talking. I got his phone number, called him, and he agreed to try to play as a trio.
We were also very lucky: Eger [2] lived one, and Péter two tram stops away in Kelenföld [3]. We met for the first time at Péter's flat. Péter had a harpsichord at home, and that's where I presented my first ideas, but we knew that we had to get a rehearsal room somewhere, somehow. At that time Görgényi Tamás was working at the Pinceszínház [4]. He helped us to get there. So the first real rehearsal of After Crying was at the Pinceszínház, and we immediately realised that we really enjoyed playing music together. A few days later, standing on tram 47, just as it was turning into Móricz Zsigmond Circus, the name of the band suddenly popped into my head: after the era of crying, let's finally do what comes after. Both Eger and Péter liked my name idea, so the three of us became After Crying.
What followed was an era of feverish, sizzling debate. We knew one thing for sure: we wanted to make listenable contemporary art music. Péter was into dodecaphonic and repetitive music at the time, Eger and I were mainly into King Crimson. So we listened to each other's favourite music and it went back and forth, influencing us mutually. We tried to get our hands on the works of almost all the famous contemporary avant-garde composers: maybe that's where we were headed?
Ligeti György was perhaps the most influential of them all. With the help of Breyer Zoli we had regular rehearsal opportunities at the József Attila Cultural Center (JAMO) in Angyalföld [5]. Most of the rehearsals consisted of collective, but consciously instructed improvisations. We improvised canon (very difficult!), repetitive music, rock, Ligeti's "meccanico" and heaven only knows what else. By then, After Crying had become a way of life for us. Endless but extremely useful discussions, listening to music together, long, long beers after rehearsals were the hallmarks of this period. Péter soon became a musician in the Tanulmány Theatre. Director Somogyi István appreciated our work and treated us with special attention. Since improvisation was also important in this theatre (we played together with a fourth, deep-thinking and good-humoured partner, Pelva Gábor), these performances and rehearsals also had a great influence on the music of the band. The discussions continued, and we finally had to find a date when we had to have our show ready. That became 20 March 1987, the date of the first After Crying concert, at JAMO of course. We recorded our first demo at the same venue, 12 days after the premiere concert, in one day. It was a special show! A consciously alternating mix of written and improvised elements. We played for 60 minutes straight. Everyone was required to solo for 5-10 minutes. At musical cues (discussed during rehearsals), we knew the improvisation was over and the other two musicians joined in. The climax of the concert was a recorded tape; while it was playing, we were completely frozen on stage in the pose we were in. The first thing on this recording was the hard rock music of the band Dallard (Gacs Laci [6] was a frenetic drummer in this group), but it also included the singing of Cicó (Andrejszky Judit), the screeching of brakes, polyphonic singing by a mixed choir and much more. The concerts ended with cathartic, sad music. This became
What was Opus 1’s reception? Mixed. Although we got a big applause at the premiering concert, the audience dwindled and dwindled at the following shows. This was partly due to the fact that JAMO had no buffet, there was no place to hang around after the concert, and the venue was distant from the established alternative venues. In the autumn of 1987 we had a concert where only one person came. We gave him a banana before the concert (it was not an "artistic performance gesture", just plain love) and then played the whole concert. He loved it! He applauded us back, so we gave him an encore. A good memory, a good concert!
The first serious professional feedback we received was from Binder Károly [7], to whom we took our show to the Jazz Conservatory, giving him a special concert. He complimented us, encouraged us and kept us going: it was a great help for us. I also studied jazz piano with him for a year after that. His whole personality and way of thinking had a great influence on me.
Gradually, an intellectual circle began to form around us, made up mainly of dissident (which at the time meant more like non-conformist), restless, exciting musicians. Among others, Szerb Kati, Szerb Zsófi, Juhász Móni, Ali Péter, Makovecz Pali, Baross Gabi, Kenéz Laci formed this expanding team. The reason for our collaboration was that we wanted to perform or at least record my work "Missa post lamentationem". These people came to JAMO for free to rehearse and try out new music. The problem was that they had a lot of other things to do, so there weren't two rehearsals where everyone was there. The first full rehearsal was during the recording of my mass.
1987 was a bitter, unsuccessful year for the group. We got to play in several places, but we managed to build up a core audience of 10-20 people only. In January 1988 we recorded the second version of Opus 1, "Break and Cry", at the Szkéné Theatre [8]. In the spring of that year, the Tanulmány Theatre had a great opportunity: they were invited to theatre festivals in Portugal and England. As all three of us were musicians of the theatre, we were also allowed to go. The actors and the director helped us wherever they could. So we had a very successful concert in Porto in May and a less successful one in Leicester a few days later. As we continued to work hard, we soon completed the third and final version of Opus 1.
Shortly afterwards we met a generous and helpful entrepreneur, Hegedűs János, who saw potential and prospect in the band and decided to manage us. János was a really good man, but he couldn't devote as much time to the band as he should have, besides his business. He however did the following: he bought a piano (!!!) for his own house and gave us the keys, saying that we would practice as much as we wanted. We took the opportunity. In his house, among other things, Hommage a Frank Zappa and Confess your beauty, both with lyrics by Eger, were written. But let's not get ahead of ourselves!
In August 1988 we added a girl singer-violinist: Szerb Kati. We started to walk new paths, we made our first vocal songs. Together with Kati we went to Israel, mainly to Jerusalem. Our trip was based on a fatal misunderstanding: Péter had a dear friend, Szenczy Sándor (who later became the founder of the Hungarian Baptist Aid), who, through an Israeli acquaintance, Harstein Jutka, managed to get us invited. Yes, but Jutka thought she was doing a good service to Hungarian tourists! When we arrived in Jerusalem, there was an apartment key and a full fridge waiting for us. Jutka was nowhere to be found. And we didn't even get to see the beauties of Jerusalem, but practiced hard for the Israel tour. Three days later Jutka arrived. Expecting eyes misted over with gratitude (and rightly so!!!), she found instead a frustrated Hungarian band in her apartment. It took an evening to clear up the misunderstandings, but it was worth it. Jutka was a brilliant organiser and booked six gigs in two days. This was a great help, because we went out with no money for the return trip ("we'll get it from the concerts"). So, in addition to the official concerts, we played street music (I played the zither, no joke!) and managed to scrape together enough for the trip home. We went back and forth by boat as "deck-passengers", slept under the open sky at night, luckily we caught good weather.
In the autumn of 1988, the orchestra also went to West Berlin through János: we gave a concert in a Protestant church, but it was just the three of us, the boys. What follows goes back to the summer of 1988. It was then that I went wild camping in my hiding place in the Bükk Mountains, and it was here that I met the great theatre director Bucz Hunor and his dear wife Liza. During our many late-night conversations around the campfire, Crying came up. Liza, who was working at FMH [9] at the time, suggested that I take a demo tape to Kardos Tibor, one of the FMH organisers. Tibor listened to the music, liked it, and offered to do bi-weekly concerts at the centre. It was a very big deal! Thanks to János we now have a permanent rehearsal room and thanks to Liza and Tibor we have a permanent concert space! We parted from JAMO in friendship, thanking them for all their help, and a new era in the band's history began.
t
Kardos Tibor made the survival of the orchestra's club conditional on having at least an audience of 60 people. If I remember correctly, we started playing regularly at the FMH in January 1989 (the same year we made a first record of the third version of the Opus 1 with the help of Szenczy Sándor and Makovecz Pali). Before the first concert, we called all our friends to come if possible, because the group's concert schedule was in danger. They came! And because many good friends met and had a good time, they came two weeks later, too. There were just over 60 people at the first concert, over 120 at the second and even more at the third. After struggling for more than two years, the wheels were finally in motion. After three concerts we changed our programme, which was not to the audience's liking. Three or four of us performed (with Szerb Kati), amplification came in, and the songs with vocals we had worked out at János' house appeared, e.g. Obituary, Lament and several other pieces [10]. This show also had its own separate audience.
In June 1989, Eger, a founding member of the band, unexpectedly announced in János's house in Göd [11] that he was quitting and would not be coming to rehearsals next day. He explained his unexpected departure not for reasons within the orchestra but for reasons outside it. As he was the most peaceful person, or even a kind of peacemaker in the group, his departure was a real tragedy for us: we even had to cancel a concert in the countryside because of it. The weeks that followed were spent in a feverish search for a flutist. Perhaps through a classified ad—I can't remember exactly—we found Eger's successor, Virág József, aka Johnny. He was a very gentle and very strange man. He could not read music very well, but he was a wonderful improviser. He had a very individual way of playing not only the flute but also the solo guitar. He was a real natural talent, with no interest in anything but music. He lived in very modest circumstances as a doorman at the Székesfehérvár theatre. Sometimes the only way he could come to our rehearsals was to put down his flute case on the floor in the underpass of Nyugati railway station and "flute the money together" for the ticket to Göd.
So in the autumn of 1989, four of us continued at the FMH: Kati, Péter, Johnny and me. But our programme changed again, much to the regret of many. We added woodwind and brass players (e.g. Tüske Aladár – bassoon, Csatos Ferenc – trumpet, Fias Gabriella – oboe and many others, as the musicians we invited often changed behind our backs, i.e. on stage). We gave concerts every two weeks, and every concert we came up with something new. The audience numbers first flattened out and then began to swell in an incredible way for us. By December 1989, the capacity of the auditorium was barely enough. It was an unbelievable feeling!
By the end of the same year, our permanent rehearsal room in Göd ceased, in no small part due to our own fault.
At the beginning of 1990 we were at crossroads. Kati and Johnny couldn't move at the speed Péter and I would have liked because of problems with instrumental skills and reading music. But they were good people and good musicians! In the meantime, we submitted our live material to the Hungaropop label, whose artistic director was Gőz László [12]. He responded quickly to our tape and invited us to his office. The gist of what he said was that the music was good, it would be released; the cellist and pianist yes, but as he saw the violinist and flutist not qualified yet to make a recording. This meeting was followed by a very sad one in which Péter and I let Kati and Johnny know that it was over. I still feel guilty about it to this day, and I think I would make a different decision today, knowing well that this already obviously doesn't mean much of a comfort neither for Kati nor Johnny.
We left the two of us, Péter and me. We found a professional violist relatively quickly in Maroevich Zsolti, an old friend of Péter's, a kind and peace-loving man. But, we had a hard time finding a flutist! He had to meet “only” the following requirements:
1. Being able to play very well and have an excellent knowledge of music
2. Passionately seeking new ways of expression in contemporary artistic music
3. Not feeling alienated by rock music just because being a classical musician
4. Being able to enjoy rehearsing a lot for free
Such a person was not easy to find (of course, the same goes for Zsolti). Finally, at the suggestion of Makovecz Pali, we met a young flutist called Fogolyán Kristóf. I have never heard such a beautiful flute sound in my life. He was also a quite particular guy, with many eccentric habits. I loved him from the beginning, and I still do.
In the spring of 1990 we didn't have a concert, we just rehearsed a lot, here and there, mostly in the Semmelweis Street building of the Music Academy's teacher training college. Knowing the new members, Hungaropop also gave their blessing for the release of the album. Since we wanted to release the album in English, I approached Görgényi Tamás and asked to translate and rewrite all lyrics. He liked the new Crying sound and was happy to get to work. By April-May, the new Crying and the new Crying sound were ready. We played first in Veszprém and then in the concert hall of the Institute for Musicology with this line-up, with special thanks to Gőz László and Kard Ádám for the arrangements. To our surprise, we were greeted by a full house and a great success in both places: we really didn't expect this. A month later, we had the chance to perform at the Várszínház [13], thanks to a talent show featuring Bródy János [14] and Koncz Zsuzsa [15]. Some time later we had the chance to repeat this concert: this time there were so many people that they couldn't fit in the theatre.
In June 1990 we made the album Overground Music. We were given 10 days, and it was finished in 12 days. We can't be grateful enough to the staff of the Hungarian Film Studio, especially Kovács Gyuri. Gyuri was strict, but very kind, very understanding and very patient. The album was released in the summer of 1990. It was a vinyl, 1000 copies were pressed, today its price is very high on second hand market.
In the autumn of this year, Hungaropop organised a festival featuring the label’s artists at PeCsa [16]. A lot of people came, it was a very successful and memorable concert. This performance was followed by several months of desperate silence. Of course, we never left the rehearsals, most of the time we practiced at Kristóf's place. From November we started to play again at FMH; the concert in December, a month later, had unforeseen consequences. That month, an old acquaintance of Péter's (who asked to remain anonymous) on a meeting with us said that he would support the band with 60 000 HUF per month (which was then about half a year's average net salary). He said: "as a well-off citizen, I feel obliged to support the development of Hungarian culture, and After Crying in particular". I have not met many "citizens" like him in my life.
His support allowed us to hire Kardos Tibor (who really believed in the band and worked hard for it) as manager, and we were also able to pay the guest wind instrument players. By this time, a very strange situation had arisen: the people who earned the most money were those who were guests. Those with emotional ties to the group fared somewhat worse. The worst off were the inner core, because we paid the risk costs of the concerts. But with the help of our sponsor's money, we were able to develop a guest core of wind instrument players with whom we didn't have to start again every rehearsal from the beginning. It took Tibor quite some effort to balance this peculiar situation with a complicated compensation system, but he managed.
There came 1991, one of the band's most successful years. We started January by perfecting the quasi-studio recordings of Opus 1 and 1989 with the help of Kard Ádám and Gacs Laci. We launched the Katakomba label, which released first the Crying's earlier recordings and later the independent efforts of some of its members (e.g. Gacs László’s cassette Egregiózum, or my own materials named Legenda / Távollét with Görgényi Tamás’ lyrics).
This year we gave 25 concerts, several of them in the countryside, e.g. in Pécs, Eger and Szeged. We could even fit to the "Music of our Time" concert series and gave a memorable concert at Óbudai Társaskör [17], several excerpts of which were released later on AC's Első évtized album. A few days later we played King Crimson's "Islands" and our own songs at PeCsa. Gacs Laci played the drums and Torma Feri [18] played the guitar. Also at that time we started to play trio concerts with Péter and Winkler Balázs.
In parallel, in February '91, Keep Cool was launched, playing weekly for a while in a very curious-atmosphere place called Styx [19] in Szív Street. This group already indicated the later Crying line-up, as there were four of us in it: Péter, Balázs, Gacs Laci and me. We played very restrained, a bit jazzy, a bit jokey music, and several new songs were written, such as Karnevál or the first version of Barnaby.
Finally, we closed the year 1991 at the FMH in front of a full house.
t
By 1992, the world had changed dramatically. In January we gave a concert entitled "Masters of Song" in the main hall of FMH. The first part was played in a kilt and the second part in street clothes. But afterwards, Péter and I decided that we had had enough of "big Crying" (mean Crying with a big band) and wanted to work again with musicians who were committed to this band for free, for life. We wept for the old, shabby years. That's not to say that those who were guest musicians (e.g. Benkócs Tamás, Reé György, Rácz Ottó, Makovecz Pál) didn't put their hearts out on a gig! The only thing is that, despite the help of our sponsor, we could not make the band a permanent line-up, as we could not promise the guest musicians a permanent job or pension, we could pay them only a fee. The core of wind players had indeed been formed, but there was always at least one person who was not available for a concert, so we always had to start rehearsals from scratch. So we tried to form a group again. Peter and I talked a lot: how to go on? We had already played with Winkler Balázs as a trio before this period, as "small Crying", and it became clear that he was a very good person to work with. Gacs Laci was a more difficult question. We knew that if we gave up the concept of “elevated rock music”, i.e. adding a drummer to the band, many people would be angry with us.
The end of the "big Crying" was announced by me, as the leader of the band, in February after a successful concert. It was horrible to see all those shocked faces: today, I think I would be incapable of making such an announcement.
And then we started from scratch, with Bali [20] and Gacs. We could rehearse almost every day in one of the rooms of the (since burnt down) BS [21], by courtesy of Kövér Péter, with a terrible piano, a synthesizer amplified by a record player and so on. But we were happy to get a place to rehearse for free! Since the offer from the EMI-Quint label gave us the opportunity to make a second album, we set to work feverishly with a new, experimental sound. In March, we recorded the new album called Megalázottak és megszomorítottak, with terrible financial difficulties. The band went out for lunch to the nearby playground during lunch breaks, as we were ashamed that we couldn't afford even a Coke at the cafeteria. Meanwhile, we lived in constant uncertainty as to whether anyone would even pay the studio staff? The lyricists also had to work extra fast, and that didn't go without friction. In any case, the end result speaks for itself.
Bors Jenő, the manager of EMI-Quint, was not very happy about the sound change, but he accepted it ("the whole album is incredibly beautiful, but how am I going to sell it?"). We presented the new material, and in response half the audience didn't come to our next concert. The thing they were most angry about was the drums: "betrayal"! In any case, the record was released after incredible hoax and lies; if Cicó's family hadn't help us, I think we would all have been sent to a mental hospital.
In April, we organised the three-day festival "Works and Days" at FMH. It was partly a professional success, but not a public success at all. At this festival we gave the last concert of Keep Cool. In any case, we continued to perform diligently, visiting Pécs and Debrecen. The audience slowly started to get used to the new material, and we had a fan base again, even if not as big as the old one. In autumn we started to play regularly in Egyetemi Színpad [22].
By the end of 1992—mainly because of EMI-Quint—I was totally freaked out.
t
In January 1993 we gave a special show in Egyetemi Színpad. It was the first solo concert I had ever given, Görgényi Tamás and his friends also read from their own works. The evening ended with an AC concert. Soon I fell ill and during my illness the boys wrote a new song without me and without my participation: it was called "Arrival of Manticore". When they played it at the concerts, I had to get off the stage or watch the action with a silent smile. In April this year, however, with the help of Kövér Péter, we really managed to make a big splash: we performed King Crimson's "In the Court of the Crimson King" live. More than 3000 people were present in the BS, and all the rehearsals paid off: we played well.
Maybe there was a concert after that, maybe not: I don't remember. We also played in Gyor and Nyíregyháza before or later. In June, I was trying to recover my shattered nerves at Baross Gábor's site, and then I got the news: in my absence, the boys performed without me at the Budapest Búcsú [23] as After Crying Workshop.
In the autumn of 1993, we continued working together with Torma Feri (who was added to the band at the suggestion of Görgényi Tamás) and Eger, who we managed to beg back into the band after a terrible quarrel.
By the summer of 1993, rehearsals at BS had ceased. For a few weeks we were able to rehearse at the Lágymányosi Közösségi Ház [24], but it was very unstable and unpredictable. Finally, with the help of Babai Zsolt, we found regular rehearsal and concert opportunities at Jókai Klub [25]. Again we started to realise a new show. After a lot of tension it was finished, it was good and we presented it for the first time in Veszprém. This was followed by concerts at FMH, at the Egyetemi Színpad and in Miskolc. The new show was loved by the audience, but by then the atmosphere within the orchestra was very bad: cliques had started to form. We rehearsed in Jókai Klub three to five times a week, but the rehearsals were more about discipline than love. Júdás, ELP's Trilogy, etc. were just heavy enough that we had to constantly work on keeping them up to standard. At the same time, as a pianist, I was completely regressed and got very fed up with the permanent line-up. I never thought of a "solo career"—as so many people later described it. I was simply interested in a whole host of other things: orchestrating Liszt's Via Crucis, string quartets, monumental piano pieces and much more.
In February 1994 we played a very nice concert at PeCsa, which included "Money" by Pink Floyd, "Starless" by King Crimson and "Leltár" by AC. In March 1994, just as I was planning the unplugged AC show, a strange voice called to me from the band.
After much deliberation, I announced my departure to the group in March, precisely to give them time to find a new keyboard player and think about the continuation. I told them that we should make one more record together and then I would quit in June.
This was followed by three disciplined months, including a tour of Canada, which was good from a professional point of view, but which I wouldn't wish to anyone from a human point of view. After returning from Canada, we played our last full concert together on 26 May at the Jókai Klub, and it was a great success.
This was followed by the recording of the album Föld és Ég, which was also not without financial difficulties, and I said right at the beginning: whether we would be ready by 30 June or not, that will be the last day for me and I am going to quit the band. The recordings were sometimes cathartic, sometimes very tense. There were lots of delays and unpreparedness that prevented us from doing a decent job, so we ran out of time.
In the meantime, my last show with AC took place at the Budapest Búcsú.
Because of the delays, the guys accomplished the mixing of the third album without me, not badly I think.
From then on, I had other things on my mind. I literally gave voice to what I was doing in Townscream's Nagyvárosi ikonok, my solo albums, the Ludi Savarienses album and the Kairosz albums.
Vedres Csaba; original Hungarian version: 18 January, 2007, English translation with updates: 17 October, 2022.
Footnotes:1. It was an experimental theatre in Budapest. back to text
2. Nickname of Egervári Gábor. back to text
3. A district of Budapest. back to text
4. Alternative theatre in Budapest. back to text
5. A district of Budapest. back to text
6. Laci: a nickname for the Hungarian given name László. back to text
7. Internationally renowned jazz pianist, head of the jazz piano department at the Liszt Ferenc Academy of Music. back to text
8. Rehearsal and performance space for several alternative theatres in Budapest at the time. back to text
9. FMH: a cultural centre in Budapest where several successful bands started their careers. back to text
10. These were later released on 1989, first on cassette and later on CD. back to text
11. A small city near Budapest. back to text
12. Trombonist, producer; later, founder and director of Budapest Music Center. back to text
13. It was a theatre in Buda Castle (the name came from it: Castle Theatre). back to text
14. Well-known Hungarian lyricist, guitarist and singer. back to text
15. Well-known Hungarian singer. back to text
16. Petőfi Csarnok: it was a major concert venue in Budapest. back to text
17. Elite classical music concert venue in Budapest. back to text
18. Feri: a nickname for the Hungarian given name Ferenc. back to text
19. It was an alternative nightclub in Budapest. back to text
20. Bali: nickname of Hungarian given name Balázs. back to text
21. BS: Budapest Sports Hall. One of the largest concert venues in Budapest at the time. back to text
22. Small theatre and concert venue in the city of Budapest. back to text
23. An annual festival. back to text
24. Cultural centre in the 11th district. back to text
25. Cultural centre in the 12th district. back to text
t
Lineups 1986—1994
November 1986 – July 1988 |
Egervári Gábor – flute Pejtsik Péter – cello Vedres Csaba – piano |
August 1988 – June 1989 |
Egervári Gábor – flute Pejtsik Péter – cello Szerb Katalin – violin, vocals Vedres Csaba – piano |
June 1989 – January 1990 |
Pejtsik Péter – cello Szerb Katalin – violin, vocals Vedres Csaba – piano Virág József – flute, guitar |
February 1990 – January 1992 |
Fogolyán Kristóf – flute Maroevich Zsolt – viola Pejtsik Péter – cello, vocals Vedres Csaba – piano, vocals The names of guest musicians can be found e.g. on the cover of Overground Music |
February 1992 – August 1993 |
Gacs László – drums Pejtsik Péter – cello, vocals Vedres Csaba – piano, synths, vocals Winkler Balázs – trumpet, synths |
August 1993 – June 1994 |
Egervári Gábor – flute, spoken words, live sound Gacs László – drums Pejtsik Péter – cello, bass guitar Torma Ferenc – guitar Vedres Csaba – piano, synths, vocals Winkler Balázs – trumpet, synths |
Related material on the website: many posters and concert photos can be found in the gallery. The history of Townscream and Kairosz can be found in separate pages.
Last update: 17 October, 2022.